d. r. a. g. g. i. n. g.

Why can't this semester just end? I've been through enough pain and torture. Really. Four more weeks of studying? I can't take it anymore!

Thanksgiving Break needs to come NOW. Dangit.

I have this awful pit in the bottom of my stomach, and I'm not sure if it is dread from the oncoming torrent of finals, the thought that I still have SO MUCH TO DO, or if it's the fact that whatever I ate last came from a box...

Most likely answer:
D) All of the above.

Winding Down...

Guess what? Thanksgiving is in two weeks! And after that we have dead week, and after that we have finals week. In less than a month this semester is over!!! How wonderful is this news? AND, because USU is the best school, we get an entire month off for Christmas Break! I can go home on Dec. 10th and I have to be back here Jan. 11th! I think, I just might survive this last stretch. I'll need a lot of Disney movies and ice cream, but I think I can do it...

And in this CRAZY life!

Let's be frank. I learned how to swallow pills at 18, exactly 2 weeks before I moved out. I don't like medicine, and I rarely, rarely take it. Literally.

I want to become a pharmacist.

Is something seriously wrong with me? I think so.

I've been having this huge dilemma about what to do for the rest of my life, and I feel so inadequate. I feel like a kid drowning in a sea of grown up decisions and being expected to make the right one to stay afloat. Should I go to UofU or Idaho State? Should I take anatomy over the summer? Am I even cut out for anatomy? Am I going to be eaten alive by school? How in the world am I going to make it into the UofU program? It's 2nd in the nation!!! Why me? Can't I stay in my little wonderful corner of the world forever? I don't want to restrict myself, and I (like a freak) love Chemistry! Is that too much? Will someone just tell me how I'm supposed to live my life?!

I've been praying, and getting answers. Mostly I just made a decision, and it doesn't feel wrong, so I'm going to stick with it. So I'm going to apply to the PharmD program and the U. And (try) not be crushed when I get turned down the first time. Life is hard.

I'm registering for classes now (only 23 more minutes) and I'm so scared that it's not going to work out. In order to get my prerequisites done in two years I have everything planned to exactness, including a summer semester at BYU for anatomy. (And I'll be taking it with my mom, how cool/weird is that?) So I'm just waiting for some disaster to occur...

Life is complicated. I don't like this pretending to be grown up thing...