To my Formidable Foe:

Dear Mr. Beetle,

I must say, you displayed quite a will to live last night. When I first encountered you by the nightstand I enlisted the help of my good friends, Mrs. Violet Shoe and Mr. C. D. Case, but they couldn't reach you in your covert position right next to the wall. Finally Mr. Case and I found a sharp corner and attempted to deal a death blow. You were wounded severely and by the looks of it, in two pieces. At that point I believed I had bested you and continued about my business.

Minutes later I looked over at the crack where your corpse had lain [I was much too terrified to move it] and I discovered it gone. Nothing is quite as unnerving as half-killing an insect and then finding it gone when you are about to rest for the night.

Later that night you had the presence of mind to scuttle across my room--exposed by the florescent light. Upon discovery I yelled to Mrs. Violet and we pounced upon you. After holding you captive for a moment and thinking you vanquished we lifted... and you began to scamper away again! The imprisonment hadn't effected you at all! The carpet wasn't solid enough to aid us in our pursuit, and you very thick exoskeleton was seemingly impervious to attack. We trapped you again,...and again, and still you would not slow. You would race off at the same skittish pace as though nothing had happened.

No progress was made and so Mrs. Violet and I tried another tactic. This time we imprisoned you, pushed harder, and twisted the rubber sole in an attempt to crush your hardened shell. We then let up to examine the effect. You were wounded, but carried on. It is here that I must acknowledge your perseverance Mr. Beetle. You were a most honorable foe. You continued among insurmountable odds and pursued your goals with vigor.

At this moment we consulted and decided that Mrs. Violet was just not up to the task. As I kept you stationary she ran to enlist her husband, Mr. Birk N. Stock. He was a sturdier shoe and together we inflicted more damage. You grew steadily weaker with each stroke and finally you were officially broken into two pieces. I leaned in close to inspect and to my utter surprise [disgust, astonishment, AND fear] you stood up and scrambled a distance! I was astounded. Your foot caught and you fell on your back with your legs flailing. In the quiet night I could hear your sharp feet clawing the threads of the carpet. Mr. Birk brought one final blow to your exposed underbelly and then you were absolutely and completely defeated. There weren't enough pieces left to pick up.

But here is to you Mr. Beetle. You fought a great fight. I'm certain it took me nearly seventeen attempts to finally best you. You are honorably inducted into my personal hall of fame as, "The Invincible Beetle." Rest in peace.

Regards,
         Tay

[This is the true story of what happened to ME, last night {minus the satire}. True, I hate bugs and I especially hate killing them, but this really was "The Invincible Beetle." I hope you enjoyed my ridiculous story. Normal life is sometimes just as interesting as fairytales.]